If you ever see me with a shirt on of a show, movie or whatever on it that you love too
you have the right to sit your ass down in front of me and start talking
my public representation of my fandoms is an invitation to come and talk to me about it
HOLY SHIT SIGNAL BOOST
OKAY OKAY OKAY so you know how certain men are SCARED of testicular cancer checks??? Having a stranger grab their balls? They could do this instead!!!
It sounded like something cr1tikal would do, so I decided to do it
Cr1tikal as the captain of flight 195 who challenged the other flight to a race
This guy wins at life.
it’s funny how you already suppose a guy did it
It’s funny how feminists suck the fun out of everything
It’s funny how you assumed it was a feminist.it’s funny how you guys cant see a harmless comment on a post without bringing sexism into it and getting offended over nothing
its funny how you can see the guy’s reflection in the glass
But for real, you know who would be more excited about the year of Luigi more than Luigi himself?
I can see him running around all giddy and being like HEY GUYS DID YOU KNOW IT’S LUIGI’S YEAR? THE YEAR OF LUIGI? MY BROTHER HAS HIS OWN YEAR AND IT’S GONNA BE AWESOME AND I’M SO PROUD OF HIM. AREN’T YOU GUYS EXCITED??? I’M EXCITED
and everybody else is like Mario jfc you need to chill
This guy was the leader of the improv comedy group I was in
when you have a coughing fit in class and you are trying to hold it in
i cant believe how true this is
The strongest ‘pound for pound’ muscle is the uterus: it weighs around 2 pounds but during childbirth can exert a downward force of 400 Newtons, which is one hundred times as strong as gravity and equivalent to the power in a fully extended modern longbow.
I need masculism because I am afraid.
you should be
when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like “lol k” and while they were gone tHE FUCKING FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like “no need to apologize, I turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong” and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder
The police just came to my door and gave me the worst news of my life. My baby was euthanized today. They told me they had no information on the person who was “bitten”. All they acted on was a picture sent to them. My baby is gone because someone didn’t like us having him.
We won’t be on tumblr, possibly ever again.
This most likely happened due to tumblr hate. I’m horrified that someone would be so heartless and the more I’m on here the more disgusted I am with people.
In the past few days I have seen death threats given to someone because of what they feed their dogs.
I have seen disgusting amounts of hate towards a couple because they are happy.
I have seen people wishing death on someone’s dog because she bought it instead of rescued it.
And now this, someone’s family pet was put to sleep today because of a false statement made by someone.
Bare in mind this animal was an indoor pet and never left the house.
I wonder where it fucking came from?
I literally talked to maythefoxbewithyou just 10 minutes ago. Likely JUST before those policemen came to her door. She said she believed it was a person from Tumblr that had called.
Shame on you. I hope you sleep well tonight over what you have done. Whoever you are.
I don’t care if your reason was “You don’t think wild animals should be kept as pets” or “You should have adopted a dog instead” or “The animal is dangerous” some other selfish BS. You were wrong. And foolishly self absorbed.
That was a domesticated fox. As far as I know, you can only get them from a Research institute in Russia for the cost of 6 to ten THOUSAND dollars. They are 50 years domesticated, and are no longer wild animals. Letting him into the wild is certain death.
But you, whoever you were- committed an unforgivable act. You ripped a loving animal from it’s owner and had him put down for no more than a phone call and fake evidence. How dare you.
I hope it hangs on your conciousness for the rest of your life. You may think that no one knows you did it- and that you can hide in your anonymous identity forever. But you won’t escape karma. And I hope it hangs your a** out to dry some day.
I also think it was more than likely someone from tumblr, judging from some drama I’ve seen in the past.
If it was, I hope they see what everyone is saying. I hope they see that they are scum and I hope they get what’s coming to them.
I think it is supremely fucked-up that someone would think “I hate this person so much on the internet that I will kill their beloved pet out of spite.”
There’s a cozy place in hell waiting for them.
LET’S DO A REVIEW OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH
WE GOT THIS SHIT AS A CHRISTMAS GIFT THANKS TO BERRY-SCENTED TUMBLR USER JENNYLOGGINS
I AM A HULKING, BURLY, MASCULINE MAN, SO USUALLY I USE OLD SPICE OR IRISH SPRING OR SOME MANLY SHIT LIKE THAT BUT TODAY I WAS OUT OF SOAP SO I USED THIS SHIT
FIRST OFF LET’S START WITH THE PACKAGING
THIS FUCKING RAINBOW-ASS UNICORN IS THERE IN THE SHOWER EVERY DAY, EVERY FUCKING DAY THIS LITTLE FAGGOT SITS THERE AND GIVES ME THAT SULTRY GAZE WHILE IM TRYING TO CLEAN MY VULNERABLE NAKED ASS
rub me on your body
ALSO IT’S WORTH NOTING THAT THIS SHIT COMES WITH A WARNING NOT ONLY TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN BUT THAT PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN CAN GIVE YOU RASHES AND PROBABLY UNICORN HERPES OR SOME OTHER SHIT
IDK ABOUT YALL BUT LAST I CHECKED THE EXACT PURPOSE OF BODY WASH IS PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN SO THAT RIGHT THERE WAS A RED FLAG BUT I PROCEEDED, ALBEIT WITH PROPER PRECAUTION AS TO AVOID APPLYING AROUND MY EYES AS DIRECTED BY THE PACKAGING OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. ALSO IT SAYS TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN WHICH LEADS ME TO BELIEVE THEY ARE MARKETING THIS PRODUCT NOT FOR CHILDREN BUT FOR GROWN MEN SUCH AS MYSELF
I APPLIED A GENEROUS AMOUNT TO MY HANDS TO BEGIN THE CLEANING.
i’m so fucked up
AND THAT WAS WHEN THE MOST POTENT SMELL OF ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED BERRY I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED IN MY LIFE HIT ME LIKE A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE
I NEARLY FELL OVER IN THE SHOWER. IT WAS SO FUCKING BERRY. IT WAS LIKE I MADE SWEET LOVE TO AN ANTHROPOMORPHIC BERRY WOMAN AND DOVE NOSE-FIRST INTO HER GUSHING FRUITY LOINS. THERE WAS NO FURTHER DOUBT THAT THIS WAS INDEED LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. IT’S NO WONDER LISA FRANK’S ART IS ALL SO COLORFUL, SHE’S FUCKING HIGH AS BALLS HUFFING HER BERRY-ASS BODY WASH.
IT GOT ME CLEAN BUT I HAVE A HEADACHE FROM ALL THAT FUCKING BERRY. I UNDERSTAND THE WARNING LABEL NOW. THIS SHIT IS PROBABLY TOXIC TO SMALL CHILDREN, IT’LL BERRY THEIR FUCKING BRAIN CELLS TO DEATH. DO NOT TRUST THAT SULTRY UNICORN. YOU SEE THE MILKY WHITE COLOR IT’S PROBABLY HIS SPOOGE IN THAT BOTTLE IT’S NOT EVEN BODY WASH I JUST CLEANED MYSELF WITH BUBBLY BERRY UNICORN BATTER
0/10 WOULD NOT BERRY AGAIN
I FUCKING AM CHOKING AND PEEING AND DYING OF LAUGHTER I JUST FUCKING CAN’T RIGHT NOW. PLEASE REVIVE ME SWEET LORD.
I reblog this every time.
Gushing. Fruity. Loins.